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Personal Relationships and Mental Health; Strong Relation, Strong Health

“She is a beautiful piece of broken pottery, put back together by her own hands. And a critical world judges her cracks while missing the beauty of how she made herself whole again.” – J.M. Storm

Personal Relationships and Mental Health

It’s now more than ever that we’ve been finally talking about mental health, taking it seriously, acknowledging it and taking care of ourselves. The pandemic, Covid-19 has taught us the importance of life, and mental stability. Recent researches have shown that there has been a rapid rise in the cases related to mental health and the number of people wanting to see a therapist or a counsellor have also increased incredibly during the lockdown. After years of hard work, mental health is not considered a taboo, rather a normal self-care issue.

You’re sitting in a room with people, having fun and suddenly something strikes you in the middle of the conversation and you zone out, you fall into trap of your own misery while everyone wonders what’s wrong with you. It’s 3 am and you’re thinking about why you cannot sleep. You feel drained without actually doing anything. You look into the mirror, wondering why your skin looks pale and why your eyes seem to be popping out, oh, it’s because you haven’t eaten properly since a long time and not drank water since you don’t remember when. You get back on your bed snuggle with your favourite stuffie and cry. It’s been the same routine for you. You could really use a hug or warm gestures from someone who cares about you but it seems like you’ve lost them during the journey, you feel lost and weary. It feels impossible to pull some positivity in yourself, laugh or eat well. It feels to be so scary at a place that you’re in right now, where everything is dim and dark and light never seems to cross your path.

The relationships you had are left behind, only the ones who gave you hand to save you from drowning are left. You are so broken that making new relationships feels almost like a burden, a hell loop you’re terrified of.

Does your mental health have to do anything with your incapability to develop personal relationships? Does it have to do anything with maintaining the relationships you already have? The answer to these questions is Yes! Your mental health has everything to do with your relationships, lacking in maintaining them and developing new ones. The reasons can be plenty.



Everyone always tells you to talk and express yourself not realizing that opening up about your situation is unfeasible. Even when you try, you suffocate and choke on your words. It’s as if you’re screaming from within but your voice is not heard. This brings complications in relationships because you don’t know how to express how you feel to the other person. Sometimes things become so toxic that you have to end a relationship, leaving a scar on you and being crowned as “the jilted lover” because you couldn’t express, so they couldn’t understand.

Overthinking becomes your quarterly medicines in a day and you start over-analyzing scenarios in your head without actually saying them to the person.



You have been broken and misunderstood so often that you’ve built these walls around yourself. The safety guard is what you call them and they prevent your soul from further damage. You become afraid to keep your walls down or to let anyone through them, because you’re afraid to be vulnerable, to be at the same place where you got hurt.

Sometimes the walls we surround ourselves with, become so thick that it becomes nearly impossible to penetrate through them. Under our guard, were the same innocent sunflower that needs sunshine, but the clouds of sorrow never seem to disappear.

The last time when you let your guard down, you were left in agony. So now whenever you think of letting your guard down again, your fragile heart gets scared of the pain again and makes the walls thicker. Good or bad, your mind doesn’t consider letting anyone inside your vulnerability.



With bad mental health, you yourself are trying to figure out yourself, let alone somebody else. You are trying to understand your own emotions, feelings and thoughts, you are so into finding the reasons behind your discomfort that you nearly forget about anybody else. You become a bit selfish, and maybe that is what the situation demands.

I don’t think you’re in a state to understand the other person, yet be kind towards them. It’s somehow the partner’s duty to hold your hand and walk you through this path of change but maybe they’re not strong enough to make through it.

Studies show that around 48% of relationships fall apart because the partners aren’t willing to sacrifice and adjust to each other. And true to the fact, so many of us aren’t even ready to make any kind of sacrifice or adjustment.



Your back has been stabbed so many times by the hugs of people you loved and you’ve been poisoned by the venom of so many snakes you thought cared about you that trusting feels like a risky gamble, and honestly you aren’t ready for it. When you are bound to face so many betrayals, the walls that you’ve built are kind of obvious to be made.

It may not be the partner’s fault, but maybe the wounds haven’t healed yet or maybe the cuts are deeper than they seem, so trusting again might feel like sprinkling red chilly powder on the wounds!

Anxiety crawls in and makes trusting someone even harder because you might have not let go of the past. You become pessimistic towards personal relationships and escape, seems a valid solution to you.




So many of us are so insecure about how we look, walk, talk or sit and so afraid to show our true nature to the world because we have a fear of being judged. There are so many case studies where couples pretend to be somebody for their partner’s validation and never truly show their true self because they’re afraid of losing them.

Fear has a habit of playing with our insecurities and sometimes to the extent where people almost have multiple personalities to please others.

Even when you have the courage to show your actual self, the world perhaps may not be ready to see that which makes it difficult for somebody who’s damaged to show their true nature which often complicates relationships because maybe people become tired and exhausted of being someone else and not themselves.




Communication becomes exclusive when comprehension becomes loose.

We often say communication is the key for a healthy relationship but we forget that it cannot do anything without comprehension. If even after communicating the person is unable to comprehend, then there’s no use of communication at all. Already if you’re facing issues related to your mental health, the least you ask is support from someone you love ad if they cannot offer you that, there’s really nothing left in your hollow relationship.

Trying to communicate your thought, emotions and feelings may be very difficult, but once you gather the courage to do so, you might see doing it wonders when your partner understands your state. After all, It’s only acceptance human is hungry for.



“We accept the love we think we deserve.”

-Perks of Being a Wallflower.

We are our greatest enemy but we are also our greatest strength if only we know how to channelize our energy in the right direction.

Come on! The world is enough to be your critic why do you want to add upon your name to that list when you could be your number 1. Fan? Self-pity is the worst kind of perception and the greatest weakness a human could possess.

We often think so low of ourselves that we fail to make the right decisions for us. We choose the toxicity, the hurt and the pain because we think we deserve it. We choose a low standard to make ourselves stand on that low pedestal while feeling extremely tiny. Low self-esteem results when aren’t fully ready to embrace our true self and accept our flaws and strengths as they are. We can definitely work upon them, but in the end our core, our roots will always be the same.



A person with good mental health may not face any such issues because they have a control on their emotions, feelings and thoughts and they may be able to analyze the situations they are in positively and accurately.

Having issues or dealing with rough mental phases does not make you less loveable, for the matter of fact, it makes you more considerate and soft towards others’ feelings. I know it’s tough sailing in the boat you’re in, but when the storm stops and the sky becomes clear, you’ll hear the chirping of seagulls and the melody of the waves. Your skin will soak all the love of nature and the bright sunshine.

None of us is perfect, but we try to become better and that’s what counts. It’s the efforts that matter, not the result. Never ever lose faith in yourself even in the darkest hour because if you cannot drag yourself out from the pit of sorrow, no help would matter.

Be gentle on yourself. Be humble with your fall downs but we brave enough to give a kick-ass comeback to the world. Remember, the world awaits your presence.

What do you think?

62 Points

Written by Hiba Javed

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Nidhi Dahiya

You are doing a great job….keep it up.

Aamina khan

Really amazing piece❤ you’re doing great ❤

Lutfia Khan


Harsh Rajput

Really amazing Hiba ❤️

Amna Alim


Amna Alim

Really loved the article!! waiting for more articles!!!

Yashika Golani

Great job dear

Deepak Budholiya

Amazing , nice

Anha Naved Ali

Amazing ✨

Sidra khan

Indeed it is amazing peice of work.
Keep it up, you go girl!!


Amazing work

Aaliya Ahmed

Amazing, Well Done Hiba!! I really loved it.❤️

Risha Patel

Amazingly penned ♥️

Anam ali


Prakhar singh

Bhut hi umda hibaaaaa❤️

Ruba Khan

Ma Shaa Allah. Hiba ❤️
Breathtaking words, I can feel every inch in my soul.
Keep up the good work my love.

Prakhar Singh Kurweti

Bhut hi umdaaa hibaaaa❤️

Sakina ali

Seriously amazing ..❤

Insha Ali


Anushka Dixit

Great!! ❤


The way you have put your thoughts is simply amazing. And this is a very relevant topic that needs a lot of discussion in regular coarse…
All the best…
Way to go …

Brinda S



Amaizing dear

Ishika Sinha

It is amazing. Keep up tje good work! ✨

Meenakshi Sehgal

Very informative and beautifully written
Keep up the spirit of writing..all the best Hiba..


You go girl…keep shinning ❤️❤️❤️
Loadssss of luvvv


You explained everything amazingly. Great work kiddo❤️

Anamta Khan

Very well written!

Anamta Khan

A must read article, definitely

Riya Rajkotiya

Wonderfully Written
Good peice of work

Simran Nair

Great Job:). The person can reflect upon your article and apply them in their daily lives to resolve issues of trust, low- self esteem, and criticism.


That was beautiful written

Femitha Rachel Ebby

This piece happened to be a ray of hope for me today. I really liked the manner in which you’ve connected self esteem to the quality of relationships one may have. I’ve always been aware of how low self esteem could be detrimental to one’s personal relationships. But this article was more articulate and helped me understand about my own thought processes and feelings better. Thank you for the final paragraph which is surely going to leave all the readers with hope in their minds.

Srijita Chatterjee

This article is very apt, and it’s amazing how I can relate to it myself. The points are very well-explained, concise and easy to understand. It is an amazing piece of writing.



Iarisa Nongbet

Wonderfully written.

Radhika Suresh Nair

I loved that beginning quote.. the entire piece is a good one..
Appreciate your efforts..

Alby Thomas

Well written!❤️✨

Akshata Hajare

OMG this is so amazing <3 i've always loved reading articles on relationships loved it!!

Prerna Dash

I loved the way you have started the article with a quote, the content in the article is very relatable and to the point. Keep up the good work!

Vidhya p

It’s perfect piece you wrote it amazingly .I felt it..great work.keep it up buddy

Sneha Agrawal

I don’t think all these issues around millennial relationships could have been placed in a better way.Amazing job!!❣❣Its so relatable and it makes sense in so many ways.U have perfectly summarized it.One of the best articles j ever read on relationships.✨

Diya Rao Jaini

This is amazingly written. Wonderful work!

Saumya Srivastava

This article hits home. I know a person with self-esteem issues because of which she lives in a constant state of fear that people in her life will walk out on her. Because of this, she does not allow people to get to know her well and has walls around her. And those who are able to get through those walls, she lives in paranoia about her relationship with them. I hope I can do something to help her. Your article gave me a perspective on her life. Wonderfully written!

Smriti Jha

This article is amazing, well written and informative. You have beautifully written it. Glad that I read it.

Trisha Baunthiyal

Wonderfully written, your article is a ray of hope for everyone who’s reading it.
Keep up the good work!


A very concise article. Found this one very relavent.

Sayeeda Zaiba

Great work Hiba. I really appreciate the work you put in to create this comforting piece of work. You use such simple yet impactful language. In times of social distancing and quarantine it really brings us back to reality and makes us focus that this is not forever. I wish there were ways to hold ourself up rather than say not to let others let us down as that would give a person more confidence and an insight to themselves. Though I’m glad I got to read your amazing work and learn from it. I look forward for more!

Pooja Choudhary

Building boundaries! I have always done that. I always felt like I was a bit too much of an open book, which might bother people. Well, sometimes it turned out to be true, and sometimes not. The article was a piece of writing. Good luck!

Janvi Shah

Personal Relationships and Mental Health
~ I agree with the facts written on this topic and yes if one is affected then the balance is also not stable.

Janvi Shah

~ I really liked the article about this and agree with the points too… Its great to know that we are learning this things by this articles..
Thank you

Umme Asma

i loved your article, it’s really important to understand how personal relationships effect mental health and vice versa. thank you for writing this

Jasnoor Kaur

This was such an amazing article! Related it to another level altogether. Can completely understand to the part of having trust issues and building walls around oneself. Would have also liked a little mention that some good support and understanding from the partner goes a long long way and gives a lot of encouragement! Also, to all the people struggling with their mental health, you all are capable of receiving and giving love. Never let anyone else make you feel otherwise. Great article, loved it 🙂