Repeat outfits, not mistakes

Not every tale is a fairy tale.

The story which I’m going to narrate is a small incident from the life of a very famous scientist Thomas Edison who discovered the light bulb.

Thomas Edison worked a day in day out to make a light bulb, he had to try two thousand materials, while looking for the filament for a light bulb. But, when none of the material was of any use, his assistant said, “All our work is in vain. We have learned nothing.” Edison replied confidently to his assistant, “Oh, we have come a long way and we have learned a lot of things. We up to now have learned that there are two thousand elements which we cannot use to make a good light bulb.” Moral:- we should learn from our mistakes.

So, Do you think the mistakes you make have anything to do with your brain? Yeah, it has a great impact on your behaviors and the brain knows everything you do including your mistakes. We all make mistakes, face lots and lots of troubles, at times it’s hard to handle everything and sometimes, we even regret things in our past. So, Do you know why you make mistakes? And how does it feel when you make a mistake? How you handle yourself when you face some troubles because of your mistake?

All your curiosities will be piqued when you will continue to read it further…

When the brain makes mistakes

In our daily life, everyone makes small mistakes maybe sometimes out of habit—when you gave something to eat to a beggar. He was thankful and said, “Have a good life” and you responded with, “You, too!” before realizing that the person is not, in fact, going to be enjoying the same life you have. Fortunately, there are some parts of our brains that control our behavior and help us in correcting them quickly.

At Carnegie Mellon University conducted research and analyzed the neural activity of the brain during learned behavior and discovered that you make mistakes as your brain applies false beliefs or internal models about how the real world works. Your brain constantly tries to predict how this world actually functions. When you make a mistake, your brain actually thinks that it is making the right decision so, the neural signals of the brain are constant with its internal beliefs, but not with whatever is taking place in the uncertain world.

Brain Sparks and Grows

When a person makes a mistake, even if he/she is not aware of it, as it is a time of struggle; the brain is challenged and the challenge results in the growth of the brain. Recently, neurological research was conducted on the brain and mistakes which is most crucial for parents and teachers. Sometimes making a mistake is good and acceptable. All the mistakes are not merely an opportunity for learning a lesson. Also, it helps the brains to grow.

It’s very critical to know and to understand how powerful a mistake can be, as children and adults often feel terrible when they make a mistake. They think that they are losers because they have been brought up in an excellent performance rat race culture in which mistakes are not valued—or worse, people are punished. It’s not that only stupid people make mistakes. If you think that way then you are totally wrong. Intelligent people do make mistakes. However stupid one doesn’t accept their mistake and smart people do.

We commit two types of mistakes which make us a better person or a worse person. We make mistakes to learn, explore, or to break out of the box which is quite fundamental. But why we are afraid of making mistakes?

As mistakes have been treated as a failure or dangerous for some reasons:-

• People are punished for not accepting the prevailing rules or norms of society. Even your brains flash an error message whenever you go against the prevailing orthodoxy.

• If a person made a mistake then various cultures scapegoat the person. It is something very serious.

• The support you get is limited. The day you make a mistake, this support system will fail. And people often lose their lives or their loved ones.

Despite all the facts, we can’t stop making mistakes. Albert Einstein says, “Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.” As I mentioned above, people get punished for making mistakes which leaves a great impact on one’s personality and they follow the same process as adults. It’s really important to know if a person won’t make mistakes then he won’t learn or explore new things in his life. However, there are few unpriced lessons you can learn from your mistakes:-

No one wants to make mistakes, I personally don’t like making mistakes but it’s inevitable. Then, why don’t we feel at ease with our mistakes? Especially, when we know that we can’t avoid making mistakes. People think that making mistakes is a part of failure and avoiding them makes a person perfect. That’s absurd. You just have a perspective that sees the world as a fixed place which is not true. The world, however, is not so certain. Like it or not, but change is something which is the merely permanent thing in this world.

Therefore,

There are amazing mistakes children should make to learn how this world functions.

No one is perfect, children spend most of their life making mistakes — not bad ones, but little ones here and there and they actually learn some valuable life lessons and those lessons prevent them from making some of those mistakes again and again. But, for the most part, don’t make them in the first place.

• Let them give wrong answers

The wrong answers might lead them to a better. I only correct my cousin’s mistakes that have certain answers like math equations and scientific theory — not the inner workings of human beings, spiritual questions, or why people do the things they do. The rest of the time, I listen to her ideas and explanations.

• Let the children trust the wrong person

Sometimes, people fail us. People who we never in a million years expected would fail us, let us down in a bad way. The sooner children learn that it’s better for them. Just make sure they always trust themselves, their instincts, and listen to their hearts.

• Let your children fall down

Who doesn’t want to protest their child? Let them run and fall so that they could stand on their own and run again. If they get small scratch or injury just hug them, clean up the injury, and send them back to play. That’s how they grow stronger.

• Let them make a mess

Toys all over the floor. Crayons scattered, dancing here and there. All signs of a happy childhood. So, let them be happy.

• They love breaking rules

Sometimes, it can be difficult but try to praise their hard work and then later talk about the things they can improve. Forget the rules.

Mistakes normally a teenager make

• Always tensed about their image

What do people think of me? This is something we all have gone through. Don’t do this to yourself. People will come and go in your life. Just be yourself and embrace your scars.

• Never listen to their parents

Understand one thing, your views and perspectives are different from your parents. Most of the time, your opinions won’t match. But later you will realize that they were right about a lot of things. Let it be a matter of your heart, your studies, your career anything damn thing which is related to you. At least, listen to what they say.

• Take drugs, drink alcohol or use other substance

You did because your friends were taking it, you feel highly excited and enjoy taking drugs. You won’t regret doing this. Doing something because others are doing is lame. Don’t ruin yourself.

• Don’t be in a hurry to grow up

You want your school days to get over. But you just can’t wait. You want freedom but you are not aware of what’s the future is preparing for you.

Mistakes people make in a relationship

Relationships can be the best or worst part of life. They spend years together but still many people fail to continue their relationships.

Why?

• They lose romance in a relation

Always remember it takes a focused effort to be romantic with your loved one, not that you won’t have any fun along the way. So, try to keep it balanced.

• Never try to control the person

They are already a grown-up. No one likes to be controlled by anyone. Try to give them their space and don’t comment or control every move the other person makes.

• Be real, not perfect

Human beings are not born to be perfect. We all make mistakes so, don’t have high expectations. It will surely ruin your relationship. Don’t fight over everything.

• Don’t try to change people

If you can’t love a person as who they are. Then don’t bother to be in a relationship. We all are unique and If you can’t change yourself then don’t expect anything from others.

• Don’t keep secrets from your loved ones

It’s not that you have to tell every single detail about your life, but you should not intentionally keep something big from them. If it’s a secret that needs to be shared then share it with your partner. It will come out eventually so, it’s better to share with your loved ones.

• Enjoy your me-time

If you spend every moment with your loved ones, you will ultimately lose your identity. Things like going to your partner for everything you will find yourself consulting that person for every small decision you make for yourself. Take some time to do what you love to do.

• Always appreciate your partner

You loved each other all of the time. Sometimes we forget how awesome the other person is until we think about them. Tell your loved one that you admire them and how you feel about them.

Feelings you go through after making mistakes. And we go through a ton of feelings.

Let’s discuss a few of them:-

 

• Embarrassment: After committing a mistake, we all feel horrible and embarrassed.
• Justification: We justify it to make it seem like the mistake is not as bad as it probably looks.
• A wave of nausea: We run to the toilet the second someone calls you out on making a mistake.
• Sinking feeling in the stomach: This is especially true when you make a mistake in school and your teacher needs to talk to you about it. It’s a horrible feeling and it lasts for a really long time.
• Guilt: it’s difficult for us not to feel guilty. We can’t accept the mistakes we commit.

 

Learn from your mistakes

When we don’t learn from our mistakes, it becomes stressful for ourselves and for others, and we risk losing people’s confidence and trust in us. So, before you put your relationship on stake, just learn from your mistakes.

• Admit your mistakes
• Try to reframe errors you make
• Start analyzing your mistakes
• Put all lessons you have learned into practice

“When you make a mistake, there are only three things you should ever do about it: admit it, learn from it and don’t repeat it.” Paul Bear Bryant

Conclusion

We are human beings and we are allowed to make mistakes, allowed to feel the pain, and get hurt. When I make a mistake, I know it, I feel it and I lose sleep. I overthink but I always admit it and say sorry. I’m my own toughest critic. You are smart if you learn from your mistakes but you are smarter if you learn from other people’s mistakes. Still, you can’t avoid committing mistakes. So, if I’m wrong tell me; don’t belittle me.