Need to belong to somebody and risk of depression

As human we have some basic needs such as food, water, shelter, oxygen to breathe etc. but one of the vital need is need of relationships. As social animals our survival largely depends upon our connection with others, we cannot survive in isolation thus relationships and belongingness carry values in each of our lives.

Our self-concept that can be said as our feelings about ourselves also depends upon what kind of relation we have with others; a good bond with others gives us joy and satisfaction. As human if we feel like there’s nobody who can understand us, nobody who can stand by us if something goes wrong then it can lead to the feelings of loneliness, worthlessness and depression. Hence it becomes vital to have healthy relationships with others to feel positive, hopeful and happy.

It is famously said by Sadhguru-

It’s only when flowers blossoms, the bees will come. If you enhance yourself into a very beautiful state everybody wants to hold a relationship with you.

When our state of mind is positive and healthy then only we will be able to experience satisfaction in our relationships. When it comes to humans we want to be part of a group and feel included, when we experience social belonging we feel motivated and happy.

For an example on our first day of school we become quiet nervous as it is a new situation and we are unaware of people around us but as soon as we get comfortable with our classmates we become happy and willing to involve in contrast children who are unable to find friends feel somewhat lost and inferior.

Exclusion causes negative effects on our behavior, thought process and emotional state. So when we have relation that is rewarding and we feel validated and value then it increases our self-esteem. Be it at school, workplace or home we can seek belongingness to others.

As humans we have the need to belong and be accepted and if we don’t feel that then it can even risk in depression or at least symptoms of depression. Feeling disconnected and lonely can induce negative effects in an individual both mentally and physically and then the person becomes more prone to depression. When a person feels low sense of belonging then this can lead to burdensome feeling and even self-injury.

A person can feel lonely due to many reasons some of them are distorted parent child-relationship, divorce, unhealthy working environment etc. Even sometimes when one has respective relationships still one can feel the feeling of loneliness, presence of a relation can give emotional support but still if there’s not enough positive interaction or attachment then both people can feel lonely therefore it becomes important to have constant and positive interaction with the persons one has relation with.

Anxiety is a natural consequence which can lead to feeling of anger, guilt or abandonment. If one has to overcome this fear then it’s important to pay less attention to these thoughts and more attention to maintaining meaningful and healthy relationship with others.