HOW TO DEAL WITH FRUSTRATION AND IRRITABILITY

Everyone’s life is filled with situations that often lead to frustration. It stems from minor irritations over the fear of losing something or some major problems due to a continued failure towards a certain goal. In simple terms, frustration is an emotion that occurs when people are unable to reach a desired goal. The more important the goal, the more frustrated you feel if you are unable to achieve it. It is not necessarily a bad emotion but if it leads to anger, stress, irritability or a spiral downward then, it can be destructive in nature. The feeling of frustration also occurs when your actions lead to less and fewer positive results then you expected.

The frustrations we face in our life are due to two types of goal blockage: internal causes and external sources. Frustration caused due to deficiencies in one’s own self such lack of confidence or fear of social situations is referred to as frustrations arising from internal sources. If one faces physical roadblocks, such as people or things, in their path of reaching their goal then frustration arising from those situations then it is called frustration due to external sources.

If the roadblock to achieving  a goal is just a minor inconvenience, then it is also called irritation. This can arise from changes in the environments or prevented from obtaining a monetary reward. In some situations, irritation is just a low threshold of  experiencing frustration.

NEGATIVE WAYS OF DEALING WITH FRUSTRATION

Different people respond differently to frustration. This can be due to personality differences as well as the environment around them. Some of the ways people respond to frustrations are:

• Anger: There is a direct relationship between anger and frustration. If the cause of frustration is too overwhelming or threatening then it can lead to displaced aggression.
• Giving up: If the goal seems out of reach, then an individual can feel like giving up as a way to cope with the frustration felt from not being able to get the desired outcome.
• Stress: Stress caused due to prolonged feeling of frustration can also have a grave impact on our physical as well as mental health.
• Depression: Depression caused due frustration can affect the way we eat, sleep, feel and act on our surroundings.

Drug and alcohol abuse are also mechanisms that individuals use to cope with frustration.Gender also plays an important role in how we deal with frustration. Men are more likely to embrace their emotions and use them to their advantage and more likely to express anger over situations that can cause frustration while women tend to conceal feelings of frustrations because of societal expectations. These methods, however, are usually self-destructive and futile measures to deal with frustration.

HEALTHY WAYS TO DEAL WITH FRUSTRATION

Over the years, various methods have been developed to deal with frustration in a healthy manner which will have a positive effect on your physical as well as mental health.

• Analyse Your Situation: Before jumping to conclusions and letting yourself drown in negative emotions think about where you went wrong and in which areas you can improve.
• Exercises: Strenuous and vigorous exercises can help you blow off the steam which help to work off the frustration. Calming exercises, such as yoga and meditation, can help you in relaxing your muscles and make you feel much lighter.
• Take A Break: Instead of giving into frustration, take a step back and take some time off from the situation. This will allow you to come back with a different perspective and make you understand what you need to do in a way that will allow you to reach your goal in a healthier manner.
• Manage Your Expectations: Understanding one’s own limitations as well as limitations that might be present in the environment around them, will allow for a better understanding of the situation and lead to a productive and healthier way to deal with frustration. Avoid perfectionism and developing self-efficacy may help you overcome the feelings of frustrations.
• Positive Mindset: Thinking positively can help you overcome the negative feelings caused due to frustrations. Thinking of the times you succeeded will provide you with the motivation to overcome solutions. Instead of beating yourself down for feeling frustrated for not reaching your goal, believe in yourself and remember that every successful person has faced failure in their life but did not give up.
• Distract Yourself: If you feel like you are drowning in negative emotions, detach yourself from the situation and pick up a hobby to distract yourself such as reading, cooking, gardening, knitting, etc. This allows you to better enhance your feelings towards a positive outlook.
• Vent Your Frustrations: Bottling in your emotions will not do you any good and in fact has many harmful effects on your health. Instead try reaching out to a loved one and talk to them about  why you are frustrated. They may provide you with a different perspective in trying to reach your goals or just take the burden off your shoulders by simply listening to you vent out your frustrations.
• Listen To Music: Music has a positive effect on our minds and therefore listening to relaxing or happy tunes can help you turn your frustrations into a more positive and enjoyable emotion.
• Individual Or Group Therapy: A therapist will be able to provide you with personalized strategies to deal with situations leading to frustrations regarding changes in thought and behaviour. Depending upon your needs, they might suggest you to take up exercises, meditation or any other emotional/physical techniques to deal with frustration in a healthy manner.

Handling frustration is never an easy task, however, it doesn’t need to be an overwhelming experience. Do not allow feelings of frustration to weigh you down, if you fail, you can always try again; it is not the end of the world. Remember that although feeling frustrated is not a choice, you always have a choice in how you deal with it. One’s life is filled with situations that often lead to frustration, you can’t change that but you can change the way they affect you.