Simone Morarka
Article Contents
The Art of Loving Yourself
There is nothing wrong with putting yourself first.
Are you too stressed to actually feel blessed? The pandemic, work/ college deadlines, uncertainty about the future or a never-ending to-do list, are all valid reasons to get you feeling down in the dumps and in the need of a Lil bit of self-love. In the current age of social media dominion, it is not just models or famous industry leaders that we compare ourselves, we are forced to compare ourselves to our friends, family and colleagues. Thus, in this constant state of comparison with others, its no wonder that we forget to look and appreciate ourselves.
Phrases like you cannot love another person till you love yourself are overused, with the actual meaning of self-love lost. It’s more than you just feel good. It’s you showing appreciation for yourself by engaging in actions that will fuel your physical as well as psychological growth; it shows maturity. Self-love means accepting your shortcomings and amplifying your strengths; it is showing the courage to find fulfilment through your efforts.
Below are a few ways to practice self-love:
- Stop comparing yourself
We tend to not be nice when we compare ourselves to others. We fail to keep in mind that everyone has different flaws and strengths; we take our biggest flaw and compare it to someone’s success- it’s no wonder we then fail.
Every person has their own unique story, what is our strength maybe others’ weakness. Moreover, you can never really understand how another person feels or perceives lives- no matter how well you may know them. Thus, instead focus on yourself and build your own path.
- Be mindful
Being mindful involves you being aware of what you think, feel and want. It involves sticking to your own volitions, rather than paying heed to influence from others. You are aware of who you are, what defines you and what makes you, you. You act on these facts, as opposed to what others want from you.
- Cut the self-criticism
Have a little faith in yourself and cut yourself some slack instead of continually thinking that I wish I were better at this or I wish I did not do that, how stupid of me. The thing about self-criticism is that we criticize ourselves and think or say thing to ourselves (say, about weight) that we would never say to anyone else. Thus, if you would never tell anyone else this, why lower the standards for yourself then?
- Live intentionally
It involves having a set purpose in life, living knowing that you will leave your mark in this world. The purpose need not be clearly defined, it could be something as simple to live a meaningful life. With this purpose in mind, you make decisions that support this resolution and grow to appreciate yourself when you work towards this purpose.
You tend to accept yourself more when see yourself working hard towards meeting this purpose.
- Surround yourself with good people
You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, says American entrepreneur Jim Rohn. Which is why, being around people who make you feel good, who inspire you to do better; is uplifting. Stay away from ‘friends’ who feel better about themselves and revel in your loss and pain, rather than be happy for your success. Be with people who push you to be a better version of yourself.
You need not follow all of the above actions to experience self-love, even following one or two is alright- as long as you begin to accept yourself. Oscar Wilde correctly said- to love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. Self-love is not a luxury, its more of a necessity given the current times. It won’t happen immediately, persistence and patience is key; because after all, practice makes perfect.
References
Khoshaba, D. (2012). A seven-step prescription for self-love. Retrieved from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/get-hardy/201203/seven-step-prescription-self-love
Other Important Articles
- What Self-Love is?
- How to Find the Meaning of Life
- How to Develop a Fulfilling Relationship
- Mindfulness and its benefits
Amazing work
thank you!!
the article was great but according to some social psychologist comparing ourselves can actually increase our efficiency of working so please be specific to what extend we should follow these steps and when it turns in opposite direction.
Hey Amrita, thank you so much for your comment 🙂 I agree with your point.
Personally, i agree that comparing yourself to soemone can ‘drive’ your behaviour and sort of push you to be better, but not to the point where you realise that nothing makes you appreciate yourself anymore. I believe that when you cannot list any points that makes you feel good about yourself, then that is point when you have to take a step back, turn around and delve into some self love.
Will try to be more informative in my coming articles :))
i read your article and I must say that it is very impressive.. nowadays in our daily hassles we are always in a hurry to beat others in the never ending competition it is really important to know how much loving yourself is important for your own mental health. your article was amzing!!
Thank you so much, Shreya!!
Hello,
This is another good article I read upon selflove and I totally loved this one also it is short, sweet and to the point. People would love to read it and implement it in real life because self-love is something we all need especially in today’s time.
Keep going
Take care!!
Thank you so much for this kind comment, Grisha! Absolutely agree with you. In this fast-paced world, we barely have any time for ourselves- which males self-love all the more important :))
I love me
As you should! Thank you, Gurleen :))
We always should love ourselves and it’s good you known it already!!
Self love is indeed a necessity! I also feel that the most important step to loving ourselves is acknowledging that it is a life long process without a linear progression!
Totally agree, Tanisha! Glad the article resonated with you :))
much needed and eloquently written. If you can’t love yourself it is difficult to love the things around you. One step at a time and you can grow into a whole new person.
Exactly, Keerthana! Thank you so much for this comment :))
some artists have done a great job teaching self-love. Love yourself series by BTS contains the journey of a person into loving oneself. Changed many lives
Ha ha, BTS did actually came to my mind when i was writing this. Not an avid, but I definitely do appreciate their music and the message they hope to send across. Thank you so much for this comment, Keerthana!!
Loved to read this beautiful written.
Self love is over-glorified on social media these days, but this, this is something someone needed, atleast me. Thankyou 🙂
Beautifull
This is such a lovely read
In the race of coming first we often forget how hard we get on our own selves and try to judge ourselves and punish ourselves….!! we should just accept the way we are because are unique in our own way!!!