Sreejita Sarkar
We’re living in a mechanical world, where no one waits for anyone. We always have to keep one eye on the clock. We have work twenty-five hours in a day in a day of twenty-four hours. There is no luxury to sit and relax. There is no provision to reflect on our life without having a sense of wasting our time.
In this world, everyone is organized, impatient, ambitious, competitive and prone to multitasking. We, humans have forgotten the essence of self-care, self-attention or self-reflection. We’re only craving to reach the helm of power, the summit of administration, the peak of success, the desire for materials and the need for social status and reputation.
We forget to satiate ourselves with the simpler pleasures of life, like literature, like music, like nature, like freedom. We associate freedom with fulfillment of our selfish needs, we associate love with validation, care with pity and empathy with sympathy.
We view money as a means to purchase happiness and comfort. We’re all chasing something so immaterial, that we refuse to perceive ourselves as the most important entity in our lives.
The universe and its forces are diabolical, the world is a ruthless place to be in, our environment can be thoughtless in the most difficult of times, the people we surround ourselves with are predators in disguise.
In the most trying times, nobody hesitates to turn their backs on you, nobody thinks twice before declining to support you, nobody transforms into the exemplary messiah of unconditional positive regard, that we read in our novels.
It is unfair to blame people for being selfish, people are innately conditioned to cater to their own primary needs first. Hence, reaching out to people may not always be the best option, even if it seems to be the last resort.
The amount of consideration and sensitivity in people is increasing only in terms of awareness, not implementation. A substantial amount of the population is aware of the gravity of mental health and the effects of mental distress or dysfunction; but how many are actually showing the desirable amount of affections and responsiveness.
It is one thing to be educated and aware, a whole other thing to be involved and kind. For all these reasons, it is of utmost importance to look for ways to aid yourself, soothe your mind, help yourself adjust and adapt to the environment and imbibe positivity in your state of living.
The dynamic of mental health is so intricate and complex that new aspects and elements of the same are being rediscovered everyday by scholars all over the globe. Helping ourselves in these circumstances is as vital as helping others.
The frustration triangle, comprising of helplessness, uselessness and worthlessness, when it surrounds us, leaves us with two potential solutions. One, spiraling into an abyss of anxiety, stress, depression, self-harm which might lead to an attempt of ending one’s life.
Two, gathering hopes, strengthening all aspirations, reevaluating all goals and bouncing back to better state of being. The better of the two choices is pretty clear and the second way, even though feels impossible at the time of distress, is not unachievable or inhuman at the slightest.
Self-help can be practiced just by following a few simple steps.
Nothing is beyond help if one knows what they want, and what they are doing.
- First and foremost, it is essential to monitor, regulate and analyze our own emotions and feelings. Our regular experiences can deeply impact our mental activities, thoughts and feelings. Instead of relying on a second individual to assess our emotional state of mind, we can detect our own sources and forms of emotional distress, weaknesses and vulnerabilities.
This is fairly simple, if we write down our thoughts, journal our daily life incidents, capture our beautiful memories, indulge in talking to our own selves, spend a considerable amount of the day recapitulating and introspecting on the quality of the day, keeping a record of the constructive and non-constructive activities of the day, practice self-reinforcement by rewarding ourselves for desirable behavior and punishing for unacceptable behavior, maintain a mood diary or an emotion calendar and keep a track record, creating a flowchart consisting all the steps to help us reach our short-term as well as long-term goals etc., we can easily determine the causes of anguish and take necessary measures to prevent them from accelerating. Being optimistic and pragmatic can also go a long way, in terms of identifying the problem areas and preventing any kind of suffering even before it surfaces.
- Another major giveaway is the essence of having a schedule, planning and monitoring all our activities can help us adequately. It is important to have all agendas in front of us, to avoid feeling overwhelmed or disillusioned.
This can also include developing and nurturing good habits. Some habits that can never go wrong include: exercising regularly, inculcating a hobby, eliminating the use of substances like alcohol or drugs and taking care of one’s physical health. In spite of a meticulously planned routine, one can be subject to a multitude of mental sufferings, which demands immediate attention.
- It is possible to help oneself even in these trying times without feeling completely powerless. In these situations, it is unarguably the best if we can pamper ourselves by doing things that are dear to us, by being around family and friends that we adore most.
- A long session of skincare, dancing to our favorite music, looking at old photo albums, reading our favorite books, binging on shows that make us happy, painting, writing, cooking, shopping, travelling- whatever keeps us merry.
- Devoting a considerable time to our family, in the warmth of our loved ones, in the arms of or partners, in the ambience of our childhood can also work effectively.
- Apart from these, it is necessary to have a healthy sleep schedule, eat healthy food and drink lots of water.
- It is also considered cathartic to practice relaxation techniques, meditation, yoga, breathing exercises, mindfulness and other soothing activities like taking a warm bath or aromatherapy. Ecotherapy, or rejuvenating in the lap of nature is also highly recommended. Activities like walking, running or adventurous sports like bungee jumping or rafting are also advised based on individual differences.
These are some ways to vent out by ourselves, we can be our catharsis only if we wish to. Loving ourselves, sorting our priorities, building up on our self-efficacy and having discipline in life is the mantra to a contented heart. Self help is synonymous to respecting and loving ourselves, never giving up in times of adversity and knowing- there is always a solution. Giving up, is never that solution.
