Depression as an Outcome of Different Feelings and Struggles

Have you ever come across a phase in your life where you eagerly try to join the dots but they don’t match? You try so hard to put everything into its place but it keeps collapsing. You feel that all your efforts are only going in vain because the outcome you desired is not what you’re getting. The battles you fight with yourself every day might start to create a void space which you can refer as depression. It is not a repercussion of only the external factors which are effecting you but also the inability inside you which caused you (or forced you, in some way) to feel helpless.

Everybody has their own bag of burdens from which we daily struggle and the possibility of these struggles strangling us is quite true. It doesn’t come into effect overnight but slowly and gradually, unsheathing the zest from your life.

The long sleepless nights, frustrations over petty things, 24/7 gloomy frame of mind and regular self-criticism—all of these are the vivid signs which can tell that you are going wrong somewhere or you are taking everything wrong somehow.

If you want to self investigate the patterns, let’s understand this by putting a situation—

Has it ever happened that you suddenly, out of nowhere, decided to learn something new and exciting? You saw people doing these cool stuffs and your heart desired to learn that too. May be watching CarryMinati convinced you to be a YouTuber/Streamer, may be the crazy dance moves of Les Twins tempted you to learn dance or maybe it was just your senior who was a maestro at playing guitar and somehow it drove a desire inside you to learn guitar as well. It really could be anything. And you just didn’t stop there. Your desires were strong and determined so you started working for it. You gave it your days, weeks and even months but the results were not exactly how you imagined them to be. You were trying and trying and blindly following the formula of not giving up but to your dismay, it wasn’t working. You felt being not enough or something like that the destiny is against you.

It’s a basic human nature whenever something bad happens, we in rage start to curse and cry without giving a chance to just sit and ask ourselves “why is it happening despite after giving it our best?” Well, the answer is you actually started with the wrong motive. Be truthful to yourselves and ask—when you started dedicating your time to something, was it even because you loved doing it or it really was a mere desire or a temptation? There was this agenda to get people applauding you, a motive to outstand and a fancy to be superior. Because these motives don’t pull out the best from you, it just stays at a very superficial level. This also results into catching different likings at different times; for a few months you were all about learning graphic designing and for some you were fancying photography.

Now all of this caused a feeling of helplessness inside you, making you a failure in your own eyes and creating that void to stay behind the wall. But you need to realize that the problem is not you but the motive behind everything you do and how you do. Making efforts at wrong place only makes you to face struggles.

Let’s take another scenario of your insecurities that occupied your mind maybe because of your physical appearance or certain health problems that caused you to think lower of yourself. A certain problem that you took since you birth, on which you absolutely had zero control but made you feeling deprecated. It wasn’t a very nice feeling but you couldn’t help it.

The attention of people started to scare you; the cameras made you self-conscious, stage brought you anxiety, and crowd made you shiver and even the simple interaction with people made you nervous. The only reason behind everything was the fear of being judged. You created a perspective about your own personality being inferior, inside your head. The hesitation continued to grow making you lack even in those areas where you can do perfectly fine. You let go of opportunities and confide yourself in definite boundaries. Those boundaries don’t do anything good but only limit your capabilities and lower your confidence more.

Another crucial thing is that not only does it affect you entirely but also your relations with people around you. You at some point, start to distance yourself. In worse cases of depression, people start to isolate themselves completely which breaks off the communication and the pool of emotions get caged inside you.

There were surely many struggles that you faced, might be facing right now and there is also a possibility that in coming future more struggles are waiting for you but you need to remind yourself that you cannot let yourself drown in these struggles; you cannot let the feeling of helplessness strangle you. Flaws are a core part of every being on this earth. Instead of pushing yourself into the hole of depression, you need to embrace every flaw and the situations as they are.

Why don’t you try taking a walk back to the road of your past which was not surrounded by flowers but had pebbles? Scrutinize that every situation you faced and try to catch the patterns that made you feel miserable. Work on yourself to be a better you not the perfect you because perfection doesn’t exist. You can always make a new beginning whenever you want but make sure that you make the beginning right, with the right motive.

Start your day with chanting positive words and a little bit of working out or exercising, eat healthy food and adapt a few productive activities like reading books, drawing/sketching/painting, and meditation, or may be trying solving crossword or jigsaw puzzles. All these things can help you to reorganize your thoughts. It will bring you clarity and positivity. Also try to communicate with people, if needed then take professional help. Not everybody will look down on you, specially the people who are there for this special purpose. Sharing your thoughts and emotions will only lessen your burden. Behold yourself and don’t let depression drain all of your energy and the enthusiasm for the life.