BREAK UP

“We are most alive when we’re in love.”
—John Updike

But what if this love starts suffocating you?

Human beings are social beings, they have an innate need to be validated, accepted and loved by other humans. A state of connectedness (emotionally, physically ,intellectual etc.) between two or more individuals is known as a Relationship.

It might be as a family, friendship or partnership in which there is some degree of interpersonal influence on each other. Developing such kind of relationships are essential as a part of growth and how to exist in a society.

Relationships ensure production of less stress hormone, leads to better emotional support and healing. But when ,a Relationship fails to provide a purpose in life and makes you stressed, it’s time to follow the next step: A Break Up.

Break Up is a term used to define the termination of an intimate relationship by any means due to various reasons. ‘Staying in a bad relationship is like letting your heart lay in the sun too long and then being surprised when it burns.

Breaking up is extremely painful but it’s beneficial and necessary in some cases.

Break-ups are one of the most traumatizing phases of one’s  life. This one incident can shake the entire faith of an individual. It feels like a setback and can make an individual question their entire existence. The feeling of  losing someone you love and planned future with is more than enough to shatter one in parts.

But that doesn’t end your life. It promotes you strong, mentally and emotionally both. You start focusing on other aspects and relationships you didn’t or couldn’t focus on when you were in a relationship. Increase your practicality in life, make you self sufficient and teach you worth those of others and your own.

A break up is a tough decision that is to made solely by you or mutually, it just doesn’t happen out of the blue, many reasons partake in a break up, some are excusable and some are not. Even if you feel sure of your decision, it means having an awkward or difficult conversation.

There are many ways to break a relationship all starting from a conversation. Every person deserves to know that why they broke up or what fell short. Be Patient, Calm and Clear in your boundaries. Although awkward but prefer to break up face to face rather than leaving texts or calls.

The feeling of heartache is usually not unfamiliar but is seriously unwelcome.

A break up exposes your own insecurities that have been residing inside you. Like every failure you might lose a heart but gain a soul. Blaming game is for kids, forgive but don’t forget and move on, Never go back to an ex and always remember the reason you broke up.

Resentment will only make you a bitter person. A Break up frees you from the bond that made you feel trapped. There is a life outside a Relationship which you’ll value once you get over a break up.

Sadly break up is not the toughest, the next step comes moving on and healing. People follow either of the strategies- getting over or avoiding it as usually prefer the later since it distracts them. But is it healthy?

Avoidance strategy is basically a short term resolve but it is not a solution, it does more harm than good.

The important thing to remember is just because you lost one relationship doesn’t means you have lost everything. You still have other people in your life loving and caring for you. And most importantly you have your own self.

Give yourself enough space, take time for your own self. Try to make a schedule, a routine you could follow including exercise and healthy dieting. Talk to your friends ,do things you didn’t when you were in a relationship.

Don’t use alcohol or other substance abuse, binge eating or following a string of hookups to get over.

A Break Up is a part of one’s life just like a Relationship, it’s inevitable and staying in a relationship to avoid a break up is as stupid as it sounds. Respect your own self, know when to stop and get out of something that is hurting you. It could be the best thing that could happen to you.