Apeksha Sharma
“Appreciate yourself first.” Quite an overrated advice right? It’s not the first time you must have heard this. It’s frequently told by your parents, friends or any other close person and frequently ignored by you. Isn’t it? I know it must be tough to love and appreciate yourself all the time.
So let me introduce you guys to the person who used to hate herself like anything. Oh wait! That’s me. Well…expected huh? Let’s go back in time to the 10 year old kid who had assumed that the worst person alive was her. You don’t have a talent. Yes, no talent at all. A complete waste.
Why? Cause she was not pretty enough? Cause nobody wanted to be friends with her? Because she was not an amazing student or anyone? I guess we have a word for that…oh yes it’s a nobody. An introvert who knew nothing. Dumb. Yes I guess that was the reason.
But, does it even matter if it was? Maybe not. My mom had the tendency of saying… “No one will like you until and unless you start liking yourself.” I ignored it. Isn’t it normal for us to ignore such advice? I decided if I want people to like and comfort me I need to CHANGE. Be like them. And the list started…
- Wear cool clothes like them.
- Don’t disagree with them.
- Follow them wherever they go.
And the list went on and on and on…
Two years of trying to be the change everyone wanted to see. You know how it ended? It was a nightmare. Was I even me anymore? What change was this that made me forget who I was? The cycle turned again and the hatred I had for myself increased at an alarming rate.
No.
I can’t let this happen…
Save me.
“No one will like you until and unless you like yourself.”
Yes, that was it.
I need to like myself…I need to accept myself.
I won’t call it sudden, after all who changes their habits suddenly. It was gradual. A very slow process. Doing things which I really liked, being happy just the way I was and every time when my insecurity was going to kick in, I stopped it. I listened to songs as if they were written for me. I smiled as if people were waiting to see me smile and that was when I knew I was going on the right route. Yes I was important. Yes, I appreciate myself and yes I am not the worst person alive. No one was the worst person.
Thank you
