Men can be emotional and cry too!

Just a few days ago, we celebrated the International Men’s Day. Celebrating the achievements across the genders, we applauded the effort done to uplift and empower Women, and to sensitize men. But are we truly equal? Can men also show the same emotions that women show, without any hindrances?

Boys and men are discouraged from showing strong emotions and crying. You might have seen your elders scolding and mocking young boys, just because they show a little emotion and cry. You might have also noticed men being mocked at, just because they are coy and shy. Men are mocked for being too ‘girly’ or ‘not manly enough’. They are told to ‘man up’. But who decided on these parameters? What were the circumstances in which they were made to decide on these? Why is it that men are generally viewed as cold, emotionless and strong, and women as emotional? Is there any correlation between gender and feelings or emotions? Science has denied any correlation between these two.

Men can be just as emotional, and cry. In fact, crying after a stressful or a sad episode usually releases a lot of stress and frees the mind from any emotional baggage. Crying is the body’s natural ways to get rid of the chemicals produced in the body. This has been proved by the fact that tears arising from different emotions; such as sadness, happiness, stress or onion tears, have different orientations, as seen under a microscope. Crying releases a lot of chemicals produced during the emotional episode. Not crying after an emotional episode blocks the outlet of the chemicals which are produced, which can harm the brain. These chemicals and emotions, after being bottled for a long time, can lead to the increase in the aggressiveness of a person and the decrease in the sensitivity of a person, to situations.

Toxic Masculinity, that is very much prevalent in our society, has given rise to men who are unable to empathise, feel and impart various emotions of a human. They have become cold and rough to suit their ‘masculinity’ narrative. They hide their pain and emotions in order to look strong and bold in front of others. This toxic masculinity has been taught to kids since ages. If not controlled now, it can get much worse. Assigning roles based on gender, and giving toys to children based on gender must be stopped. Kids should be taught that anyone can be bold and strong, and anyone can show emotions. They should be encouraged to choose the roles and the toys as they wish. Boys that cry during childhood must not be mocked or chided, but rather be consoled. All kids must be taught to be expressive and to express their feelings properly. Only then we can evolve as a society.

So men, do not care about anything or anyone! Do not bottle up your emotions! Be expressive! Cry your heart out! Share your stories and feelings with others.

Extended Reading:  The Science behind microscopic images of tears of different emotions