If I were to say, most of us are guilty of believing that lie in our childhood, that being an adult is the key card to let us do anything we wanted, I knew I wasn't the only one who thinks like that, right?. As I go through adolescence, the more I got into trouble with doing the things I wanted. I fall really deep into a lot of dilemmas. My parents were really nice and considerate of me, they were like the type of parents who would let me explore things and taught me to be independent and responsible. With such an opportunity, I got to experience and try new and a lot of things, and I was enjoying it, not until I have to choose a specific decision, worst is when they ask me to commit to it. My indecisiveness took most of my time, leading me to a lot of pressure and anxiety and end up with rush decisions. I just knew I was the type of person who loves trying new things and gain experiences, that is why it was hard to know what I really want to pursue. Well, I'm into art I love and enjoy it when I do designs and draw what I am imagining in my mind. I also wanted to be part of a film directing and production, I am really interested in movies and have experienced creating short videos from directing and editing during high school. I also wanted to be a soldier, I was part of our organization during high school we called CAT, citizenship advancement training and I was one of the officers, specifically, Lieutenant Commanders. Since I was into a lot of movies, I've watched a lot of psychological thrillers that got my interest in Psychology. And I have many more to mention.  To be honest, I still can't believe I were able to choose Psychology with all those choices I have, If you would ask me why am I having a bad time choosing?, It was all because of one thing the fear, the fear that I might just wasting my time, the fear of dissapointing my own self for not being able to be satisfied and achieved that happiness after choosing, the fear that you might end up regreting what've done and not be fully fulfilled with my decision. People around me made it sound it so easy when they choose their own course, they be like "choose what you love" but what If I love and enjoy doing all of them ?. But what made me got into my course or should I say what made me decide to do a decision is that, to identify who I am, sounds absurd?. Thinking back in time, I have realized that I was really a brave and courages person for being able to try and explore new things so what should I be scared of. I have realized not only me who is scared of what the outcome of our decision would be, instead all of us but other people where able to still decide. I have realized that I don't need and I will never be able to please people around me the way I wanted to. I have realized choosing one decision will not stop my interest into other things and that we all have the time in the world to achieve what we wanted. And if we are not able to achieve one of them is a big 'ITS OKAY', because after all we're human stick in the ground wear and that the fulfillment and happiness is found inside me and not into how high I will fly and what kind of bird I am.

With all that, I were able to woke up at one time being so courageous that I went into my enrollment form and write B.S. Psychology, after all Psychology made a big impact in me. Understanding something complex (behaviour) is not only putting up a degree but exploring myself also. I am able to understand my feeling, emotions through sudying the course. Though I can't say that I have fully overcame my indecisivness however, I can only say I am developing at least.

I hope people who suffers the same thing with me could also share theirs, as I've wanted to know how they're coping with it. Thank you guys for taking your time to read mine :))